Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Fucking Cats In Adachi-Ku!

 I don`t know when it started or how it started but my beloved Adachi-ku has been invaded by cats. For the past several years Adachi-ku Tokyo has been under attack by loud, nasty, hungry, fighting, fuck loving cats! This problem would not be so bad if it was not for the amount of hell this gang of cats are able to produce in just one night. After one night in Aoi you would think that some twisted feline WW3 had started. What do people in Tokyo consider Adachi-ku? Did the Japanese secretly decide to declare Adachi an official dumping ground for all the metro area fucked-up out of control cats?

I have done my best to accept and even befriend our invaders but they are not interested in being friends. These damn cats want to take over I tell you! I can deal with the fighting because sometimes that shit is real funny. What is really driving me up the wall and costing me sleep is the fucking. Cats fuck in the loudest most god awful way possible. It sounds like a gang of demons from hell and ugly Star Trek aliens having a porn quality orgy. Go ahead and let that visual sink into your head for a minute. Now you know what I deal with every night. Cats get pure fucking crazy when they fuck. There is no sense in that shit! By far, cats are the most insane fuckers on this mud ball called earth.

Even though I don`t like these crazy goddamn cats I still have to share the hood with them. So how do I deal with little bastards? I have tried several things to cope. I have tried music, which just distracted my mind even more, and movies which failed to drown out the sound. I got really pissed off one night and threw rocks at the cats. They only left for a few hours and when returned and started fucking again. At this point I am pretty much out of ideas. I am now asking yall what I should do about these no good fuck crazy cats. I need some good suggestions before I go into the street with a bottle of wine and a hammer!